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The goal is to establish an environment where they can feel heard without being enmeshed in the negative.
The purpose of relationships is to promote mutual development, happiness, and support. However, it can feel like you’re carrying an emotional burden that reduces your value and hope when your partner is constantly negative. Negativity can have a detrimental effect on your mental and emotional health, whether it manifests as persistent criticism, negativity, or an inability to perceive the positive aspects of life. Understanding how this behaviour affects you and choosing a management strategy is essential. Recently, the online user named @therapyjeff, therapist Jeff Guenther, recently posted “eight ways to deal with a partner who’s incredibly negative.”Here are some suggestions from the therapist to help you deal with the situation and decide whether it’s time to move on.
Tips To Deal With Negative Partner
- Validate Negative ThingsFirst, they recommended that people “feel understood and empathised with” their partner by validating the terrible things they are discussing. Guenther admitted that a lot of people have probably attempted this previously, but he suggested doing it again from a different angle. “Maybe they keep repeating themselves because that’s all they need from you,” he said. “Feel free to meet them where they are and be a little negative too, just don’t stay there.” The goal is to establish an environment where they can feel heard without being enmeshed in the negative.
- Be StraightforwardThe therapist also advised being “straightforward” about how your partner’s pessimistic outlook impacts you. He told to say something like “ I want to hold space and support your feelings but constant negativity overwhelms me. Can we work together to find more balance?”
- Create a negativity-free zoneGuenther suggested establishing a “negativity-free zone.” “It sounds simple, but it works really well,” he continued. Establish designated times and areas when complaining and grousing are not permitted at all. Recognise when to leave persistent negativity.
- Set Emotional BoundariesAdditionally, Guenther suggested establishing “emotional boundaries” and being transparent about your ability to cope with adversity. He recommended, for example, saying, “I want to support you, but I only have about 15 minutes to hear you vent right now.” This lets you set boundaries while still being supportive and caring without letting the negative get to you.
- Encourage Problem-SolvingGuenther then suggested refocusing your partner’s attention from whining to problem-solving to promote problem-solving. “What do you think could help fix that or how can we tackle this together?” he said. It is a long shot but it suddenly shifts the conversation.
- Change A SubjectAnother piece of advice was to completely change the topic of the conversation.He told ” When they get negative, pivot every time, talk about something else.”
- Don’t Take It PersonallyGuenther concluded by highlighting the significance of avoiding taking your partner’s negativity personally and reminding individuals that their attitude or mood is about them and not about you.
- Consider CompatibilityLastly, Guenther suggested that people “consider compatibility” with their consistently negative partner. He clarified, “It’s acceptable to doubt the connection if their negativity is enduring and unalterable. If their persistent negativity is bothering you, you have the right to leave.
Even while you can help people through difficult times, you must put your own health first. Mutual effort is the foundation of healthy relationships, so if your partner refuses to confront their negativity, it might be time to go on. Keep in mind that you deserve a relationship that supports and encourage you, where both parties work to create a happy and encouraging atmosphere.